


Worries That Overcome

by Narlth



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: 5x10, Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-05-11 12:35:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5626885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Narlth/pseuds/Narlth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternative look at Merlin’s reaction to the prophecy of Arthur’s death, in 5x10.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Worries That Overcome

**Author's Note:**

> For the prompt: Loss of vision.  
> I took it in a non-literal sense.

Merlin blinked, a chill- a numbness spreading through the whole of his body. This couldn’t be right... there- there had to be some sort of mistake. Arthur had become the centre of Merlin’s existence, that one person he loved above all others. If he lost him then he had no purpose left, no reason to continue.

Around him the world continued to turn, but he couldn’t bring himself to continue with it, not even to move an inch. This couldn’t be true…If it was everything he’d done these past years would be in vain. 

A waste.

His eyes dropped, gaze landing on a pale hand, resting on the edge of the table, liquid filled his eyes, threatening to spill free.

Across from him Gaius lowered the slip of paper, his own grey eyes dull, as he felt just an inkling of the grief Merlin must feel.

What was the point of his destiny if this was to be the result? All that hard work, only to fail.

A lone tear carved its way down his face, hanging for a moment on his chin before falling and disappearing out of sight. On some level Merlin wished he could follow- to disappear become unseen and unnoticed by everyone.

He wanted to rage and scream, was his existence purely to be destiny’s plaything… Solely for entertainment, to be used up and thrown away once his value was used up?

He registered that Gaius was speaking, but none of his words reached Merlin’s ears, only a hum as if cotton filled his ears blocking the outside world. His eyes slipped closed, he felt like he was standing on the edge of a cliff, the darkness at the bottom reaching out, _pulling_ at him, dragging him towards its depths. His destiny like a chain stopping from ever moving forward, ever escaping from the darkness that was failure.

Absorbed as he was Merlin didn’t realise his body had actually started tilting, until suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder, steadying. Eyes snapping open, his vision was blurry, until his eyes met with Gaius’s concerned ones.

“My boy, perhaps it would be best if you went to bed?” The old physician kept his voice low, as if talking to a startled animal. Both of the physician’s hands now hovering nearby in case they were needed.

Nodding mutely, Merlin placed shaking hands- when had they started shaking?- on the flat of the table, pushing himself up. The moment he tried to take his own weight however, his knees gave out. His mouth opened as if to cry out, though no sound came to his lips.

He would have hit the floor it Gaius hadn’t halted his fall before then. Blinking sluggishly Merlin was lifted, with one arm slung over Gaius’s shoulder. He tried to offer up a smile, but he knew he hadn’t succeeded as Gaius’s expression remained sympathetic.

The pair make slow progresses across the room, Merlin still feeling numb, uncoordinated, and Gaius struggling under his old age.

The short set of stairs were difficult to mount, Merlin’s feet dragging with each step he took, threatening to land him on the ground.

Inside the room, Gaius deposited the warlock on his bed, taking the time only to remove his shoes before pulling the blanket up to Merlin’s chin. Surrounded by warmth, his eyes suddenly grew heavy and before he knew it Merlin felt himself sinking into sleep. The weight of a hand ruffling his hair the last thing he was aware of.


End file.
